You need a life philosophy.

Hi, my loves! I know it’s been a while since I’ve written. I was working on a big project.

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As a woman, how many times have you been in a situation where you were attempting to solve a problem with a group of people, at work or with friends, and a man seemed to be very sure of his way and you were pretty sure he wasn’t right but you didn’t say anything. And then, turns out, you were totally right all along and he never was? 

We women need to learn to speak as loud as men.

Don’t fall into complacent acceptance of somebody else’s way just because they speak louder than you.

My personal philosophy used to change based on who was the loudest voice in my head at any given moment.

For example, if I read a compelling quote on a poster I would pretty much immediately take it on board as truth. If it’s on a poster and accepted by tons of people it must be true!

But just because something is commonly accepted and written in bold print, does not make it right. 

As I moved forward in life I realized how much contradiction exists- between everything and everyone.

In college one of my friend groups thought I was a wayward maverick for smoking weed and partying, while my partying friends saw me as Ms. Goody Two Shoes.

It was at that point I realized that no matter how I choose to live my life I will be contradicting other people’s belief systems, so it’s high time I just stick to my guns, no matter who I’m around.

Only you know what is right for you at any given moment. And what is right for you will be wrong for someone else.

People that stand strong for what they believe in and seem to be unshakeably confident did not get that way by accident. 

They got that way because they decided to be.

In order to stand strong for what you believe in you have to know what you believe in. 

To know what you believe in you must define the following:

your desires, your values, and your God.

These three pillars make up the base of your personal life philosophy.

Your life philosophy is your compass, the only thing you need to look to when making decisions.

Your personal code of conduct. 

Your ninja way. 

Your standards. 

A life philosophy will ensure that you always return your trajectory towards your highest self.

Pillar One

Desire: The language of divinity. 

Higher wisdom speaks to us through the pull of our desires. 

Following where desire leads is a sacred act.

I’m not talking about short term impulsive desires like fucking every hot guy you meet or eating pizza every night for dinner. Impulsive desire is short term pleasure, empty and hedonic.

When I say desire I am always defining it as sacred desire.

Desire that feels expansive.

Desire that challenges you to become a better version of yourself.

Desire that pulls you up, not down.

What excites us, energizes us and gives us joy should be what directs our decision making. 

Following desire take us places that don’t seem “logical”.

That is because “logical” is a construct of culture. The “logical” way of doing things is just the way we have been conditioned to do them and is the way that, most likely, supports the system more than it supports you.

The desire is the goal and intuition is the path.

When you follow intuition you are in direct contact with higher dimensions. Higher power communicates with us through joy and excitement.

We bridge the gap between our higher self and this self with time.

Spacetime is the 4D. 

Intuition has foresight and higher understanding that you aren't able to see in the 3D with your limited human brain. 

Desire is not selfish, but rather desire is what points you in the direction of growth and sustainable happiness. 

True desires will be in alignment with your values- this is how we verify their validity. 

Pillar Two

Values: The core that grounds you.

When you live in integrity- when your actions align with your personal values, you have an unshakeable confidence that comes from an unbreakable core. 

To be confident you must have values. When someone does not have core values that they adhere to, the more they become untrustworthy, wishy- washy, and flaky. Having values means that you will repel as many people as you attract, but you will repel the people that don’t align with your values and attract the ones that do.

It can be startling for the ego when you start living in accordance with your values, because you will become more and more polarizing. 

You won’t stay in spaces you aren’t valued. 

You will walk away from deals where you aren't being offered what you deserve. 

You will stand up against people when they are being unjust. You will risk being unpopular if it means standing up for what you believe to be right.

You will wear what you want even if it means that you are overdressed. You will dance and sing when you feel joy because you don’t care if people think you are drawing attention intentionally. 

You aren’t afraid to piss people off because you know you are pissing the right people off. 

Your values must be based in truth, undistorted by egoic veil.

These values that you hold are your center. When you have values that you live your life in accordance with, you never feel lost because you always know the next right thing.

Some of my core values are:

★ I trust my intuition when making decisions for my life.

★ I believe in a friendly Universe, a benevolent God. I see the good in everything.

★ I believe all humans are created equally and perfectly. I am not above or below anyone else. 

★ I know I deserve to prioritize my physical health.

These are my unshakable truths.

Any situation that would force me to act out of alignment with these values, would be a situation that I would get out of immediately. 

Pillar 3

God: The level of magic you are willing to accept.

You need to heal your relationship with your God. Put the image of a white man in the sky out of your head. 

When I reference God I am referencing whatever it is that is orchestrating our experience. I am referencing the goosebumps you get when you hear beautiful music. The feeling of watching the sunset over the ocean. The feeling of falling in love. The feeling of being in the crowd on a gameday when your team just won the game.

The feelings we feel when we tap into the fullness of our humanity.

Everyone has a God, whether you call it that or not. 

Whatever you dedicate your life to, becomes your God.

If you don’t intentionally curate your relationship with your God, you get the one that is given to you.

I was raised Atheist so the god I was given was the god of achievement and rugged individualism. 

You may have been raised in religion and been exposed to all of the corruption and misinformation that exists in the Church which may have led you to reject God.

But ditching your connection to the divine when you decide to ditch religion is throwing the baby out with the bath water. 

You get the God you believe in. 

Seek and you shall find. 

Begin looking for evidence that the Universe is friendly, that God is on your side, and you will begin finding it. 

Once you heal your relationship with God you begin to see how everything is working in your favor and everything that seemed like it was a hindrance, was actually protection.

With God is where the real magic happens.

Once you are clear on these three pillars you have the foundation of your personal life philosophy. 

From this base you can build anything you are brave enough to desire.

I officially launched my website for my alignment coaching services! 😄 

I have spots open for five 1:1 clients.

In 1:1 sessions we get really clear about the exact curriculum you need and the exact action steps that will move you in your desired direction. We get into the nitty gritty and dissolve it from the inside out. After the month of guidance you will leave with an arsenal of tools and access to all of my current teachings. It will be enough to keep you busy for a very long time- in the very best way. By the end of 4 weeks you will have stepped into a new embodiment of self, and I will hold your hand the whole way through.

xx Bella