the pendulum of self-worth

｡𖦹°‧ Happy Mercurial Monday. This week I am explaining the foundations of true self-worth. I do offer 1:1 sessions and would love to answer any questions you have.｡𖦹°‧

Every time you create an ego-based statement about yourself, an equal and opposite statement simultaneously comes into existence. This equal and opposite statement doesn’t come into your conscious awareness yet- but exists underneath the surface of your awareness, until it is activated.

This is a Universal Law- The Law Of Polarity

This happens because anything that you say about yourself that has an opposite statement is always untrue. It is a lie told from the ego.

Universal balance will always be achieved. 

(The Universal Law of Oneness, my fav law <3)

So the initial statement made will always have an opposite statement that exists somewhere in your psyche- to balance the scales. This opposite statement will eventually bubble out as another statement about yourself that feels equally true in the moment. Neither statement is true.

But in the the moment you create the statement, because of the circumstance and your lack of self-worth, it feels like it is true.

Ego- based statements sounds something like these:

“I am hotter than her.” 

“My work is better than theirs.” 

“I am such a good person.”

“My voice is prettier than hers.” 

“I am the best.”

These statements are always situational. The specific instance in which you create an ego-based statement about yourself is relational to what is going on around you at that time. Something external led you to create this statement.

You may identify with this statement for a long time- hours, days, weeks, months, years- but at some point in the future, in a different situation or maybe even the exact same one, you will make an equal and opposite ego-based statement about yourself that will feel just as true.

“I am not as hot as her.”

“My work is way worse than theirs.”

“I am such a bad person.”

“Her voice is better than mine.”

“I am the worst.

Every time you make an ego-based statement and believe it, you are dropping a pendulum.

When you feel like you are on top of the world, it feels like nothing can bring you down. 

When you are in the lowest valley, you don’t feel like you'll ever be able to climb out. 

The pendulum always swings back

….time to stop dropping the damn pendulum!

When you allow your self-concept to be dependent upon external situations, it will always feel like a violent pendulum swing. A back and forth between feeling amazing and feeling like shit.

The statements that you create about yourself must be based in truth for you to feel at peace with your internal state. 

“One’s ships come in over a calm sea.” // Florence Scovel Shinn

You have to know that the thoughts that pop up in your mind that are ego-based statements- are always lies. 

The only truths are Universal and always prevail. The only truth is that you are inherently worthy and perfect- exactly as you are. You are a fractal of pure divinity.

Any comparison you make between you and another is futile.

You are supposed to exist as you feel called to exist. When you are doing this, there is no way you are wrong. There is no way to mess up living your truth. 

You are not worse than anyone, you are not better than anyone. 

We all are One. 

You cannot allow your self-worth or self concept to be reliant on external forces, because situations always change. When you rest your self worth on others, the same person who decides you are worthy could get mad at you and decide you're unworthy- so silly!

People all have different veils, traumas and projections that will distort their perception of you. 

You must know who you are, and know that no matter what goes on around you, your values remain. 

You must make self statements based in truth- not ego.

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Truth-based statements:

“I am worthy.” 

“I am perfect as I am.” 

“I am always enough.” 

“I am beautiful, because I am myself.”

“Nobody is better at being me, than me.” 

“When I live in my truth, I attract goodness into my life.”

“When I take care of myself, I am healthy and happy.”

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Life achieves balance, always, because life is truth.

The yin has the yang, the moon has the sun, the negative has the positive. 

It’s the two together that equal truth.

Truth doesn’t have an opposite. There is only one.

All tea, no shade.

                          xx Bella